Kapampangan ku!

Migagalak tamu keng pagiging Kapampangan
Masanting yang gamitan para keng kasulatan
Dakal man lenggwaing malyaring gamitan
Buri tamu pa rin ing amanung sisuan

Mitwa kung magsalitang Kapampangan
Mibyasa ku ring salitang dayuan
Oneng eku pa rin akakalingwan
Reng amanung minuna kung pekamalan

Atin kung metung a pigaganakan
Ot megbayu ing enerasyung kaanakan
Mibait la mo kanung Kapampangan
Ali da naman balu ing Amanung sisuan

Masakit man, eku aiwasang isipan
Ing amanu tamu ba mekalingwan?
Sana mibalik ing pamagsalita tamu ngan
Gamitan tamu ngan ing Amanung Kapampangan

Mibuu ya ining kakung kasulatan
King inspirasyun kareng kapwa Kapampangan
Ini ing tula ku para kareng kaanakan
Basbasan na sana ning kabanalan

The Day Before Christmas!

There is this fat and tall guy in red suit who is walking on the street saying “Ho-ho-ho” again and again. Until, he saw this man with long hair, white dress and frown on his face, and suddenly went closer to him. The man knew that the fat and tall guy in red suit was Santa Claus.

The man was Jesus Christ and he means it to Santa Claus saying: “Hello there Santa Claus, I am Jesus Christ. To be honest, I am quite sad.”

Santa Claus replies: “But why are you sad? Tomorrow would be Christmas Day right? It is your birthday!”

“That’s exactly my point.”

“Then why are you frowning like that?”

“It is because of the people, majority have forgotten what is being celebrated during Christmas. You, Santa Claus, are whom the people expect and not me. I am not being envy but I feel nothing to them. You are the main character of my day.”

Jesus Christ then turned around and walked away from Santa Claus. Jesus Christ continued walking along the town, as he roams around, he hears songs about Santa Claus playing on their houses, children singing songs about Santa Claus, decorations and stuffs of Santa Claus spread everywhere and some are praying addressing to Santa Claus instead of Jesus Christ.

On the house where Jesus Christ is standing for a while, there is this young girl named Jen praying. Jen is not aware that Jesus Christ sees her saying: “Hello Santa Claus, I am wishing for a cellular phone this Christmas. All members of our family have it while I have none. Thank you Santa Claus, I am hoping you’ll grant it.

Jesus just continued walking, and then he heard a teenager praying on another house so he stopped again and listens. The teenager named Joe is lying on her bed saying: “Dear Santa, I have been single since then; I am wishing to have someone who could fill the emptiness in me. I want a boyfriend pretty please!”

Jesus Christ just walked passing by that house. Along the road was a tarpaulin from the town’s Mayor with written message “Season’s Greetings Everyone! I can be your Santa this coming Christmas Day, just go to our City hall and receive your gifts!” Jesus just did not mind it; instead, he walked toward the church. As he is about to reach the church, he saw a crowd near it. He went closer to see.

There are two boxes named with “Letters to Santa Claus” and “Letters to Jesus Christ”.

Jesus goes to the box where his name is written. He saw a number of people writing and in the box is a little amount of papers filled with messages. He did not go closer to the box; he stood in a tree near it and observing.

On “Letters to Santa Claus”, there were many people writing what they want to receive this Christmas. The box is almost filled with messages though there were still many to drop. The young girl, Jen and the teenager, Joe are also there to write their wishes and drop it to Santa Claus’ box. There is also this girl writing to see her sisters for she is longing for them. She is Mary and her message is “Santa Claus, for a long time I have not seen my sisters. I miss them so much. How I wish to see them this Christmas, Thanks!”

After all messages were dropped, only Santa Claus stayed there and collected the messages of the two boxes. As he goes to the box for Jesus Christ, he saw Jesus hiding in the tree and suddenly disappeared with a cheerless face. Then, Santa Claus discovered why because there were a little amount of messages dropped for our savior. Santa Claus then go away with the messages because he needs to prepare for something.

The people go to church for the Holy Mass. The wishers a while ago, both for Santa Claus and Jesus Christ, are also coming. Most of those who wished to Santa are forced to come because of their parents.

The Holy Mass for Christmas Eve have started, the homily of the priest is now being delivered:

“Good evening dear brothers and sisters, first of all, I want to greet you a ‘Merry Christmas!’ I have something to share to you and I think it is best for you to know. Just this day, I talked with Jesus Christ. He is sad, he is sad just before his birthday approaches. Do you wonder why? It is because of you, people. The idea of celebrating already have changed for many, most of you are thinking what to receive or what you want to receive. You are waiting for Santa Claus’ shower of grace to all of you while in fact; Christmas is the birthday of Jesus.

A while ago, near our church, there are those boxes for your wishes. The boxes were named ‘Letters to Jesus Christ’ and ‘Letters to Santa Claus’. I have seen too many messages for Santa Claus while for Jesus is few. People are expecting that they will receive their gifts through Santa Claus; does he have the might to do that? In the first place, she was just formed by imagination. The people are expecting Santa Claus; they have forgotten that Christmas is for Jesus Christ.

You know, Jesus was also there. I have seen him just before he disappeared. I have seen embarrassment on his face. I, myself, also became embarrassed of what happened.

Do you think I am just making my story? This I say to you, I am the fat and tall guy in red suit, I am the Santa Claus in costume!

That’s why I want to clear it to all of you, Christmas is the birth of Jesus Christ, Virgin Mary gave birth of Him. It’s not receiving something from our Santa’s but it is giving something especially love for everyone. Let us all rejoice for Him. Happy Birthday Jesus Christ!”

The mass continued until the priest ended saying: “The Eucharist has ended, go in peace.”

The crowd are now about to go outside the church. A man stands to go, then he stepped a foot of a girl. The girl was Joe and he finds the guy so attractive and same with the man to Joe. Joe says to the man: “Jesus gave me YOU!”

Out side the church, the young girl Jen found his Godmother and approached her. Her godmother gave Jen a present; Jen excitedly opened the present and saw a brand new Blackberry Phone with charger. Jen says: Thanks Jesus! My godmother became your instrument to give me this gift! Thank you so much!”

Then, there are girls shouting so loud. The one was Mary and the others are her sisters. Finally, they met each other again. They hugged each other and continued screaming. Mary became silent and faced the church saying: “Jesus, thank you! Although I didn’t wished it to you, you still granted it. You really are kind! At last, I can feel the opposite of emptiness — completeness.”

Everyone in and out of the church, along with the chorale are singing the song “Joy to the World” The real essence of Christmas goes back to the heart of the people.

People all over the town are now at their respective houses to have the “Noche Buena” to celebrate birth of Jesus Christ. They are already having their countdown cheerfully.

The priest is still in the church sitting on the chairs, lifting his head to see Jesus Christ on the cross. He says: “Jesus, you are almighty. You disregarded the mistake of people and gave them their wishes just to make them happy. I am thinking, you did that because that’s what will make you happy too. Now I have proven that it’s really good to “Give Love on Christmas Day.”

The Whole True Story (Unfinished)

I

There’s a guy who is so addicted to Facebook has a friend in it named Maria in which he does not know personally. The guy deletes his unknown friends but the coincidence of not deleting Maria in his friends just let the girl remain. She does not have a clear or close picture of her on Facebook that’s why Zhab doesn’t recognize her. He even thought that Maria was boyish for she is in a relationship with a girl named Jam on Facebook.

II

The guy is Zhab, studying in Republic Central Colleges (RCC), who is such a jolly, jocular, friendly and sociable person. He had befriended many of his fellow RCCians though he is a graduating student. He is the type of a guy who falls in love so quickly and he is not that “torpe” so he confronts the girl that he loves her. Though so quick, Zhab means what he says. He does not care if he would be rejected as long as he would not regret that he didn’t expressed his feelings to a girl.

February 11, 2011, Friday – Zhab saw a girl who was very beautiful and pleasing and so fell in love at first sight, in his four years in RCC, it is his first time to see the girl though they are inside one school. He tried to know her name but failed to do it. Zhab suddenly saw a friend and tried to ask about the girl’s name. Zhab’s friend tried to look at her ID from afar and he said, “Angeline.” It seems inaccurate but Zhab keeps it in his memory, all he knows now is that the girl was from the Juniors because of the P.E. Shirt she’s wearing.

Since Zhab has many friends in the campus, he tried to ask his friends - through text - about the girl and confirm if there is Angeline in RCC. Unfortunately, there’s no Angeline. Zhab still does not lose hope. The next week, Zhab was not able to see her for it’s the Intramurals and Foundation Week in their school. The week after the Intrams ...

III

February 22, 2011, Tuesday – the girl, with her friend (the one who is in relationship with Maria on Facebook named Jam), approached Zhab for a question and so they talked. Zhab became curious why the girl he loves was with Jam, he grabbed the opportunity to ask the name of the girl. He discovered that the girl on Facebook and the girl he fell in love with was only one – she is Maria. What a coincidence, maybe the reason for the girl not to be deleted is that they are meant to know each other. There, he knew Maria in Facebook wasn’t boyish, Jam was only her friend and that relationship thing was just for fun.

In the evening, they were both online in Facebook and Zhab chat him. For the whole evening, they were chatting and talks like they knew each other for a long time. They even talked about the upcoming Junior-Senior Promenade, which they will attend soon. Maria said she’ll be wearing a dress made of basahan with different colors. That sounds weird right for it’s too imposible but that’s how the story goes, both of them cracks a joke about it. Both of them knew that they have many similarities, and so Maria said to Zhab that they are “SOULMATE”.

Zhab then says simply that he will dance with Maria in the Prom. Then they made it weird again, they’ve said that they will dance after the Prom at the middle of the road. Until, both of them logged out.

IV

Zhab and Maria became friends. Since the day they knew each other, they often meet early in the morning on the corridor and anytime on their campus. When they see each other in the morning, the girl first greets Zhab with “Goodmorning” and the guy gives response. Sometimes they talk even for a while.

One hot afternoon, Zhab saw Maria at the canteen. However, she’s with her boyfriend who’s a not-that-close friend of Zhab. Zhab was somehow sad for a while. Suddenly, he doesn’t mind, anyway it is better he knew it too soon. Zhab then felt happy for he became a friend of Maria.

V

The JS Promenade came and everyone looks so glamorous. As Zhab goes out of the car, he has been searching for Maria but he hasn’t found her. However it’s okay, he then found his classmates. Inside the Rib-Eye Function Hall – place where the JS Prom 2011 was held – was full of handsome guys and pretty girls.

Lucky for Zhab, in the crowd at the stage, he saw Maria. Zhab walked towards her and asked for her hand to dance. Maria then gave her hand. It became a very wonderful moment for both. They even talked about their conversation on Facebook while dancing, and they laughed about it. They danced on the dance floor with the song "King and Queen of Hearts". ♫

Though Maria’s boyfriend was there also, Zhab was still able to dance with her. And nothing’s bad there since they’re friends.

VI

Zhab, who is eager to get to know the girl more, wanted to know the cellphone number of Maria. Zhab knew that his first love and Maria are friends, he tried to ask his first love if he could get the number of Maria. Luckily, Zhab’s first love gave it. From that night, Zhab and Maria started to text each other.

As time passes by, Zhab really feels the intense love for the girl.

VII

Zhab saw the boyfriend of Maria with another girl, he concluded that there’s a third party in their relationship with Maria. For his concern for Maria, he will surely say what he saw, it’s not to make them angry and have break-up but to make Maria aware of the wrong doings of his boyfriend.

The next day morning, Zhab and Maria met again then without saying a word about the incident. Maria said she knows about it but his boyfriend is lying that the girl was his cousin. Maria was also aware of the lie and she said to Zhab that by tomorrow, they would break up.

Zhab was surprised with that. He doesn’t know if he should be happy for Maria would be single or if he should blame himself for there are couples breaking up. However, nothing he can do, it’s them to decide.

The day after the breakup, Zhab and Maria texted each other again and their Zhab says he’s very thankful for that worthwhile moment of dancing. Maria was pleased and said thank you. Zhab then asked if she enjoyed the whole prom though he was with his boyfriend that night. Maria responded that it’s awful and she doesn’t want to remember it anymore. She also said that was worse.

VIII

Zhab has a concerned friend, a girl, who noticed something between him and Maria, She told Zhab that Maria is some kind of flirt but Zhab thinks of it as a judgmental act only. Though Zhab don’t know much of Maria yet, he still don’t believe it. Whether it is true or not, Zhab still has the love for Maria. If ever it is true, Zhab just thinks that he can change Maria by giving her the true love he has.

IX

Graduation Day is getting nearer, Zhab decided of revealing his feelings to his special someone. He does not want to regret that he would not be able to express his feelings. It was Sunday evening, March 20, 2011.

March 21, 2011, Monday – Zhab woke up early to prepare before going to school. He first went to 7-11 to buy a chocolate and then went to the flower shop to buy a red rose. He went to school neatly then patiently waited for Maria. Unfortunately, Maria came late so Zhab just asked his friend to give it to her.

March 22, 2011, Tuesday – The same preparation happened, but Maria was absent. Zhab was disappointed but he never loses hope. In the evening, he sends her a text message about it and confirms if she will enter the school by tomorrow.

The next day, the same preparation happened and luckily, Maria came early. Zhab went to the classroom of Maria and called her. Maria came out of their room and she was surprised, maybe she didn’t expect that i get ready to tell her personally. Zhab didn’t hesitate to ask her “Pwede ba kita ligawan?” and she responded “Ngayon? Di pa pwede eh. Kaya mo ba maghintay?” Of course, I replied with “Yes!” (Zhab silently said “I Love You”)

That moment made them closer to each other; though Zhab was not yet given the chance for courting, he still shows that he passionately love the girl. They started to know each other better.

They even chat on Facebook often every evening and on March 31, 2011, they discovered that they both have Twitter. So, they followed each other. From that night, they’ve been tweeting instead of chatting through Facebook.

X

April 6, 2011, Wednesday – It’s the day of Graduation. There is a mass offering in the morning and the Graduation event is in the afternoon. At noontime, Zhab asked Maria if she would come. Unfortunately, Maria can’t because it’s also the graduation of her little sister. However, Maria said she would try to come. Zhab felt a bit sadness but he understands her anyway, her reason is also much important.

The graduation event proper came, the guy is about to graduate, walking down the aisle, thinking that he will leave his school. He’s still looking around for Maria. She’s not there and Zhab just focused on the event. (Zhab’s plan if Maria was around, he will make his parents and Maria to meet.)

After the event, they went home and just enjoyed the mini party for him. (How he wish that Maria was there)

XI

For the whole summer vacation, they’re not able to meet even once. However, they still have communications via text message, Facebook and often on Twitter.

Twitter has been they’re best communication online. Whenever they are online, they tweet. The’ve been talking whatever they want and sometimes what’s trending on twitter.

More often, they communicate through text, and sometimes they do it until midnight since cellular phones are just handy. One night, they were texting each other then Maria said wait for she’s doing something. So Zhab just watched television but it’s already too late in the midnight, he thinks Maria will not text anymore. Suddenly, Maria texted around 2AM, she was impressed that Zhab was still awake.

Also, while texting each other, there are stories shared and jokes cracked, and one time, Maria said Zhab has a sense of Humor. It was only Maria who said that to Zhab.

As they continuously communicate to each other, they have known each other even better; discovering a lot of common things and shares the same thing. Often, the common things they have.

Maria is an Azkals fan for they are trending that time and they are blooming in the limelight. She influenced Zhab and so both of them become fans of Azkals.

Also, both of them are fans of Demi Lovato and so they are called Lovatics. Demi is such an inspiration to both of them, behind her great and meaningful songs is a story of a change.

XII

Time flies so fast, it’s the school comeback. However, Zhab and Maria are not together in one school anymore. Zhab has to move to Holy Angel University for his college degree, he took up BS Accountancy. On the other hand, Maria remains on RCC to finish her High School and she is next for graduation. Distance is not a hindrance for Zhab, he still visits RCC often to see her and visit his friends.

Though he is on HAU, there are many beautiful women there. His heart stays on RCC, to Maria specifically. Maria has changed him a lot and even Zhab wonders for how he has been changed. He even thought love is powerful.

For his love to Maria, he even gave some of her needs such as books; he gave his’ and bought her those he does not have. He even searches for on-sale books for Maria’s friends to get close with them.

July 1, 2011, Friday – The first time that Zhab asked Maria to go out with him to watch a movie, Transformers III. Maria agreed but she’s not much sure for her parents are strict. Maria said she would just text Zhab by tomorrow if she’s given the permission.

July 2, 2011, Saturday – Zhab woke up early to wait for Maria’s text if they are to go or not. Zhab first texted Maria and asked her. After an hour, Maria replied with No. How sad. Zhab is very muchnanghihinayang but nothing he can do. He just went to the mall alone and bought his Azkals shirt. Now, both of them also have their own Azkals shirt.

(Zhab wanted to be with her badly and he wanted Maria to choose the design for her Azkals’ shirt)

XIII

Maybe, distance is really a hindrance. For Zhab does not know what happens to Maria, he is being paranoid and curious about the girl’s current relationship status. Zhab thinks Maria has someone already and nothing he can do. It’s kind of hard for Zhab so he would just keep himself a little far from Maria.

Zhab, instead, sees it on the good perception. He treats Maria as a friend though he still truly loves her. He just thinks that it is the way that they would remain connected longer.

Maria’s birthday comes; Zhab prepares a gift for her that represents four things: “Happy Birthday” “I Love You”, “Thank You” and “Goodbye”. On the day of her birthday, August 9, 2011, Zhab allotted a little time of his lunch break just to give his gift to Maria on RCC. Maria was surprised – very surprised – of the gift and Zhab is very glad that she liked it very much. The gift contains a T-shirt, baller, cellphone lanyard and ID lanyard designed with Azkals. However, Zhab did not say to Maria what he means for the gift, what is clear is that the gift is a present for her birthday.

Since that day, Zhab decided they shouldn’t meet for long but they still communicate sometimes. Still, Zhab greets Maria “goodnight soulmate” often every night and text each other whenever available.

XIX

They also give moral support whenever they have competitions and hard doings.

Zhab was about to compete in a poetry writing contest, an event in line with Buwan ng Wika at Holy Angel University. Only Maria among all RCCians was informed about it. Of course, Maria wishes him good luck.

Zhab secretly knew that Maria as also competing for Mutya ng Buwan ng Wika. Zhab told Maria about it and wishes her also good luck. Maria was surprised that Zhab knows it, he then told Maria that her classmates told him.

The night before the contest, an RCCian friend of Zhab told him that Maria already have a boyfriend. However, Zhab just kept it and he didn’t ask Maria about it so the way they treat each other would not change.

Zhab’s intense feeling of love is above everything what Maria does. He stays in love with her after all, a good perception he has. He thinks that anytime they would break up and he could have his turn.

Just like a child who’s playing too much on his childhood days so when he started studying, he focus on studies than playing. That’s how Zhab thinks as of now, he wants Maria to play on love until the time it Maria and Zhab would be together, no more playing.

The whole night, Zhab was thinking of that. He was quite depress and he was unable to practice his writing skill. He will just write on the spot by tomorrow.

XV

August 18, 2011, Thursday – Early in the morning, around 5AM, Maria texted Zhab with good luck and #gosoulmatego for support. Zhab woke up and read the text of Maria, he was surprised and felt the luck. However, he’s still depress.

At the contest proper, Zhab have written the best he can. He passed his written poetry although he knows to himself that the poem wasn’t the best yet. When asked by his friends about the contest, he answers that he might not win but he still hopes. Announcement of winners was the next day.

August 19, 2011, Friday – In the evening, Zhab was announced as the First Runner-up winner. He was very glad for he didn’t expect to win anymore. However, we was very thankful to God that night.

Zhab soon texted Maria about it, and then on Twitter they were like celebrating. Zhab said to her, I made it and thanks to you, now it’s your turn, you can do it. #gosoulmatego!

August 30, 2011 – Zhab has his class in the morning and the event is also in the morning, that’s why he is unable to watch Maria on the stage. He just texted his friend, classmate of Maria, to capture a video and photos of Maria. In that event, Maria was hailed First Runner-up. And the news very soon known by Zhab and he became glad. Zhab soon texted Maria saying congratulations.

In the evening, they were texting again, celebrating for the win. It has been a great month for them and they’re lucky both of them had won on their competition. What’s nice is both of them are First Runner-up, seems like soul mates. #gosoulmatego!

XVI

Zhab knew that Maria had a broke up again. He became very concern of her condition, he doesn’t want her to be sad. He texted her with the intention of making her happy so won’t feel sadness much. Maria calls Zhab as a SG that stands Security Guard. How weird it is but it sounds funny for them. Until, they call each other SG and then time came the meaning became “Servants of God”. Both of them are close to God.

Zhab then smells another chance for her. After a long time not seeing each other, Zhab appears in RCC again to meet Maria. And, they became closer this time.

All of a sudden, Demi Lovato released her comeback album with her carrying single “Skyscraper”. Demi blasted again her career and became trending in Twitter very often.

Azkals also popped up for the Long Teng Cup. And, both of them had their own new Azkals Shirt in addition to their collections.

Those became their topics while texting or tweeting each other. Just like before they became cold. It is like, the time they became okay again, their interests or idols goes into limelight again. That was unexpected and Zhab was amazed of it.

October 2, 2011 – Camp Rock was aired on TV but on tagalong version, it’s kinda funny hearing foreigners talking in tagalong. Zhab wanted to watch it but he was unable to. Instead, he borrowed a copy of the movie to Maria. Maria agreed to lend him her Camp Rock and said they will buy a clear copy of Camp Rock 2. The next day, they meet.

October 3, 2011, Monday – The first time they went out of RCC, they went to market to buy a DVD of Camp Rock 2.

In the market, they were searching if there’s still Camp Rock 2 and luckily they found one. Zhab purchased it and gave it to Maria. However, Zhab holds the Camp Rock and Camp Rock 2 movie to watch it at home. They would just meet again to return it back.

Before heading back to RCC, they ate for a while. They went to Chowking and ordered the same meal. After eating, they went back straight to RCC. They stayed there with Maria’s classmates. They went home at around 7PM, Zhab as a gentleman, guided Maria going to their home. There he also knew where Maria’s house is. It was the longest that Zhab was with Maria together, and he is very happy for that day and seems unforgettable.

XVII

Zhab thought he’s almost there but then he discovered he’s in the middle of nowhere. The closeness in them was again in danger; Maria is becoming cold again. And, she’s like giving less attention to Zhab. Zhab really thinks of it, he wonders what went wrong for her to change. Nothing’s wrong. Well, he then thinks that was just a short happiness given by God.

It was wrong timing, the Final examination days of Zhab was approaching and he was depressed of what happened. To avoid the feeling of being hurt, Zhab keeps himself busy studying so he could have high score in his examinations, it’s too good for a student to think of it.

Until, Maria doesn’t even text Zhab anymore. Maybe he’s moving away to Zhab so he could let him forget about her. It’s like a non-verbal kind of saying goodbye. She does not even reply to Zhab texts. So Zhab did the same thing.

XVIII

All examinations are done, final requirements submitted and hello SEMBREAK for Zhab. He is already free from studying as of now for four weeks. He has nothing to get busy with so all the time he was thinking of Maria. As a remedy, he is writing poems about the things that he feels so that while thinking of her, he could be busy and the sembreak could not be wasted.

At the second week of Zhab's sembreak, he knew that his grades are high and he assumes he was part of the Dean's List (Those who have the average ranging from 1.26 - 1.75). He wanted to thank Maria for it for she became the inspiration, but he just became silent instead. (Before, they were celebrating everything good that’s happening but now it's not the same anymore)

XIX

Now, they were just sending each other some Group Messages. “Masakit isipin na iyong taong katext mo ng napakadalas noon, Group messages na lang ang ipinapadala ngayon”

Zhab again thinks of his thought before,

“Just like a child who’s playing too much on his childhood days so when he started studying, he focus on studies than playing. That’s how Zhab thinks as of now, he wants Maria to play on love until the time it Maria and Zhab would be together, no more playing.”

He also decided to stay single and let destiny to work on now. If they are really destined for each other, they will meet in the future and they will be together more than friends.

Now, Zhab is moving on but he doesn’t know if he can. He’s always emotional of the hurting he is feeling. He cannot deny to himself that he feels the pain too much. As he wants to move on, the more he reminisce the moments with her. It’s really hard to move on. Also, the things they had before are missed by Zhab.

Zhab’s dad brought Zhab a soccer ball which make him think of Maria more. One time while playing, he said to himself,

"How I wish I'm playing with Maria because they wanted to play it before and also she is the reason why he wanted football."

And then whenever Zhab tunes in to the music channel and even radio, songs played are related to Zhab. Another, there is an event in RCC and both of them went there, but not together. After the event, heading home and it's already too late in the evening, Zhab saw Maria and he hesitated if he should guide her until she reaches home. However, Maria was with her friend and Zhab is a little bit shy since they're not close. Zhab finally decided that he would let them reach their home alone.

After that incident, Zhab regrets very much. Until he reaches home, until the next days, he was thinking about it. He regrets and thinks he should still be a gentleman to guide them.

He cannot deny to himself that he cannot move on and he always thinks of her. Many has changed to him and only Maria does it, how can he move on if the best part of him was only Maria.

XX

Zhab thinks of another words of love,

“Moving on is like a toothache. You will always feel the pain and you cannot avoid it. But someday the tooth will be gone and you will not feel the pain again. Same with moving on, there is the pain, and the day you finally let go of the person, you will be relieved.”

So Zhab just suno himself of the things that make him remember Maria, instead of avoiding it, he would likely to have it.

Whether dreaming while sleeping or daydreaming, Maria is the main person appearing.

XXI

Zhab now is spending most of his time studying and he already changed his plans. Now he wants to be part of the top students in his batch so he could get a scholarship. And he wants to finish his course so he could be successful and prove to himself he can live without Maria.

However, he still plans that if someday Maria and him will meet, he wants to court her again and make sure they’ll marry in the home of God.

Once upon a time, Maria came and gave colors to his life. Just like other stories, there is the ending. But, is this the ending already? How sad if it is. Anyway, they say that there’s a new door opening when there’s a door that closed.

How deep is the love of Zhab. Although he knows that the girl was not there anymore, he did not care for all he can feel is only love - pure love. After all, he still loves Maria as part of his life. He loved, loves and will love Maria faithfully.

XXII

After several weeks, they still are friends. They text each other and asking how's life. The conversation went smooth but it's hard for Zhab. Maria sees Zhab as a friend while Zhab sees Maria as his everything. However, Zhab is happy that it was Maria who texts him first.

Zhab pretends that he already has moved on, but honestly he didn't. Maria is still the only girl in his heart and mind, unfortunately, it won't seem to be them anymore.

XXIII

Until now, they haven't seen each other, Zhab really misses her too much but he has nothing to do. He wants to go to Maria but he doesn't know how while in the first place, there's no reason for Zhab to come.

From the day that second semester of Zhab has started, he had less focus in his studies. He doesn't seem to study well, he seems like uninspired. Well, he's inspired with someone who makes him feel expired.

The bad thing is, Zhab promised himself to make a good show on his studies so he could achieve higher grades and to gain a scholarship. But, what's happening with him, he changed a lot. No doubt, his studies is affected by his emotions.

Zhab's life became boring, he does not enjoy it anymore. He goes to school unwell and goes home unwell, something's wrong and even Zhab noticed it. He has the money he wants to buy what he wants, but still not contented with what money can buy. How pity he is.

Zhab still prays whenever he goes to church that Maria is safe and happy, also he wishes someday it is still them. He still wants all the best for her.

XXIII

One time, a friend of Maria and Zhab texted each other. Maria's friend said, Maria still wears the baller & other things that Zhab gave to her as a gift. Zhab is very happy, very much happy. Though the feeling he has is still hurting him, he suddenly felt happiness for what he knew.

Zhab now plans for another gift to give for Maria this coming Christmas Day. Now, he is still thinking what to give.

XXIV

It's Christmas Eve, Zhab hasn't prepared anything for Maria anymore since they won't seem to meet. However, he is planning to greet Maria at exactly 12AM. He does things to help his parents for the Noche Buena until 12AM came. Zhab hurriedly sent the text he prepared to greet Maria a very nice message. Hoping she replies.

Zhab was waiting in vain, received no reply. Zhab just slept in the couch with different thoughts in mind. One thouht, he would just greet Maria again on the New Year's Eve or Media Noche.

XXV

On the new years eve, Zhab was thinking to say goodbye and give thanks to Maria for a wonderful year. He already thought that there's nothing to happen anymore. He would just conclude that 2011 is just a very amazing year for there came a girl into her life that made him feel so special and the end of the year seems to be the end of the love he cherish.

So, At exactly 12AM, Zhab greeted Maria, along with the words to say goodbye and thanks. Zhab dedicated the song "My Love Is Like A Star" sang by their favorite singer Demi Lovato, which is a very good song to let Maria know how Zhab still love him. The chorus lyrics:

".. My love is like a star, yeah, you can't always see me but you know that i'm always there. If you see one shining, take it as mine, and remember that I always care. If you see a comet, baby I'm on it, I'm makin' my way back home. Just follow the glow, it won't be long, just know that you're not alone... ♫"

And still, no reply. Different thoughts on the mind again until he got slept on the bed.

XXVI

Since the start of 2012, Zhab didn't text or send Group Messages to Maria and to her friends related to him. Zhab becomes desperate to forget the feelings he has.

Zhab entered being a part-time student aide in Holy Angel University and was assigned at CICT Dean's Office. This became effective to forget Maria for the meantime. But, still, while on the workplace, Zhab is still thinking of her, searching her name on google (since FB and Twitter are not allowed) just to see a picture of her.

Zhab just spends his time with his work and studies, and surfing the internet. Same routine happens everyday.

On February 11, Zhab remembered the day he met Maria and reminisce everything that happened since they met each other. On February 14, Valentine's Day, Zhab went to RCC to see Maria after his work. But, when Zhab went there, Maria seems to be not at the school anymore.

XXVII

Zhab removed his birthday on Facebook a month before it. It is just a  way to know who really are friends with Zhab, those who knows when is Zhab's special day.

Zhab's birthday is approaching. Zhab has been longing for Maria so much. He then prayed to God that he want to see Maria which can serve as his birthday gift. On the March 16th, Friday, Zhab went to the Apung Macalulu Chuch, near to Maria's house and school. He went there to pray and suddenly, unexpectedly, Maria was there. Though they are seats apart and not able to talk, Zhab is already glad for that. It is very unexpected because Maria has her classes but then she's there on the church. Maybe it's God's plan and I thank him very much! :)

When Zhab's birthday came, there are only few who greeted him. Sadly, Maria is one of those who didn't greet. Of course, it's a very big deal for Zhab. On his birthday last year, Maria was the very first one to greet him but now, no greeting at all. Maybe, Zhab should just stop thinking that he is someone on the life of Maria. Instead, he should think he's just anyone who passed by on her life.

On March 18, Zhab went to different places, alone. Upon going home, Zhab he dropped by to RCC. Unknowingly, there was an event on the school. The lassmates of Maria asked me to watch and so I went there. I, with the friends of Maria, went to their room and so I saw Maria there. Surprisingly, she sang aloud, greeting me a Happy Birthday. Truly, it's better late than never and it's the value that counts. Honestly, I am overjoyed and I am very very thankful. :) Maybe it would be better if she greeted me without me telling them it was my birthday. But, still I am very thankful.

XXVIII
During the summer, Zhab is convincing Maria to study on the same school as him. Throughout the summer, Zhab is doing that though they text very seldom

And, it was a success! Maria studies in Holy Angel University! They are on the same campus now.
Zhab thinks they would be able to meet often since Maria took HRM as her course. Then, he knew that the HRM moved to another building, meaning, they are way far from each other.


XXIX
Maria is still included on Zhab's Prayers, praying she is still on good condition, in good health and happy as it seem.


It seem very simple, but it means a lot to Zhab.


XXX

Maria's Birthday is approaching. Zhab has been thinking of a gift to give. He was planning to leave the gift to Maria's room in school but named to her. So Maria wouldn't know whom it is from. Zhab made up his mind to give him a bouquet of flowers, a cake and a 1Direction Magazine.

 Just before the day of her birthday, it rained very hard, There's no class on the day of Maria's birthday so Zhab decided to donate a part of the cash to the needy instead of giving a gift to Maria. People need them more than Maria needs a gift, maybe Zhab made a very wise decision there.

XXXI
Success! After a long time of murmuring! Zhab had successfully moved on after a long period of time! How did Zhab confirm about it?

September 3, 2011 - Zhab saw Maria halfway, she is with a guy and seems they're a couple. And Zhab felt nothing anymore, only a feeling of seeing a friend after a long time.

Zhab just realized this while thinking of that incident:

"You'll know you have moved on when you see the one you love with the one she loves, and you feel happy for them but still wishes that the one she loves will not hurt the one you love."

I think it's about time to be happy again, now that I am loving to study a lot, maybe I can use most of my time studying rather than being depressed by love.

Now, I would just let God find the person that can make me really happy and let Go of the things that makes me sad. I really thank God, He is my Father.

The only challenge for me is, how can I spread love to many people, so I can share the love that God gives to me. :)

I am ending this story here. But, what if there's next?

Continuation depends on the future happenings.

P.S.

They say, it is sweet when someone knows every detail of you not because you remind them but because they pay much attention.

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I love you.

What money can't buy?

Just yesterday, "#moneycantbuy" & "#whatmoneycantbuy" are trending on twitter. I thought of myself and reflected from it, what is that thing? Then, I thought of the song by Jessie J, the Price Tag. The song states that "Money can't buy us happiness" and it is true. Happiness is a feeling of something intense with divinity.

A thought again entered my mind, I realized that every time we are buying the things we wanted so much, it is not happiness. Because happiness is tangible, maybe a reason to have it is something tangible also. Agree?

As I think further, I realized deeper what happiness is. Recently, my father is giving me much money than I need. Thus, I have now collected them to save it and so I feel so rich by now. They're all in my wallet at my pocket everywhere I go. However, as time goes by, I see myself unhappy though I have the money. Did you get the point? I don't buy the things to save many yet i'm unhappy. I have the money to buy the things I want but still unhappy. Sometimes I buy the things I want, yet I am still unhappy. It just shows that happiness needs no money.

Before, I have just the right amount to survive each day, my daily allowance is just sufficient for my needs. Above all, I am happy and I live to the fullest.

Do I need to give the money to whom it supposed to be? I cannot take the risk that in case I give the money to others, I am still unhappy.

I wonder, what can make me happy again?

The Boring Routine

I am Zhab. A child of God, a family member, a friend, a student, a simple man. I am those kind of person often in my routine, nothing better and nothing worst.

During weekdays, Monday to Friday, I have one routine. I wake up in the morning, take a bath, dress up as student, go to church, go to school, study, study, study, dismissed, thinking where will I go, then go to SM Clark, roam around, nothing to do, go home, then play football, then sleep in the afternoon (watch Naruto as alternative), wake up in the evening, play computer, eat dinner, still on computer, log out, do anything else, sometimes study lessons, pinaglalatag ng higaan si Dadz, until, i sleep in the midnight. Another thing, texting for the whole day. That's my routine, only, i skip some of those mentioned because of some reasons. Also, when I don't go to SM, I walk my way home. See how I memorized my routine? A fact I do it again and again with no lies.

In my saturdays, I usually spend it at home. I wake up, eat three times a day, clean the mess, text the whole day, nothing more. Sometimes, I go anywhere just to spend my time. If there could be classes, then I'll enter the class.

During Sunday, my priority is to attend the Holy Mass. I do everything I want as long as I attend the holy mass.

That is how i spend my week, I am wondering why is it so boring. I feel nothing good of what I am doing, I see myself so pathetic. Can you tell me why? hm.

Now

Soul mate, I love you

More than anyone can do

Will you love me too?

You can have my heart

Please do not break it apart

Promise we won't part

I'll never hurt you

I hope you'll do the same too

Our hearts won't be blue

Will you love me now?

Now that I have told you how

Say YES, I'll say WOW :)

Wo De Qin Ai

I did everything for you my love
But I'll just let it fly like a dove
Nothing I can do but to accept the truth
I cannot blow to create sound in a flute.

Sometimes it is better in movies
For us there can be possibilities
But I need to face the reality
I have to wake up from the fantasy.

If you would just gave me the chance
I can give you my best dance
But I fell and you didn't catch me
I cannot even go forward to thee.

Suiran wo hen ai ni
Wo mei fenfa gaosu ni
Wo xin zhong yi you oh ` qin ai
Danshi shi wo de ai

Hero or Zero?

This world was created by our Almighty God

We should be thankful for what we had

He protects us from disasters like flood

Also prevents us from being bad.

But there is a problem with us people

We destroy the creations which are wonderful

Just look at our planet so awful

Let us awaken ourselves from being fool.

Let's make it again a wonderful place

So we could live and our Earth stays

We can clean our planet in so many ways

Just do it on all of the days

God speaks and our planet makes echo

We need to follow this motto

In this world we should be a Hero

Or we will lose it and gain Zero

BitterSweet

Every smile has a meaning

Every happiness has something

Every day is worth living

Everything happens when a guy is falling

Every sadness has a reason

Every tear has an explanation

Every pain has a caution

Everything is behind one person

The world has really been too small

Of the billions, to you I fall

I love you more every time you call

Your heart is ready in my heart to install

I showed you love with all my might

But you felt it only slight

I can't be jealous because I don't have the right

For I just hid and I didn't fight

We are meant to see each other

Till the end we'll live together

If only we could live forever

I will love you and leave you never

It hurts me that we're not meant to be

Though I know that you belong with me

When can I set myself free?

If I am the bee and you're the honey

This poem has been bittersweet

I wonder how those stanzas fit

Lines are made with how my heart beat

I guess I need a first aid kit.

Once Upon A Time

I fell in love once upon a time

It was true and I'm not being a mime

I can see myself smiling without a reason

But I discovered behind it there's a person

I felt like a prince once upon a time

Rescuing a princess in the tower I'll climb

I thought of it like another fairy tale

Like a story where love don't fail.

I felt like a poet once upon a time

I had written poems with stanzas on rhyme

The story is that we are together

How good to know that the ink belongs to the paper

I felt like a criminal once upon a time

I stole your heart and it's a crime

But it's no good so I returned it

At least I had you in a little bit

But not all things last forever

There's no such thing as "Happily ever after"

Everything is just chances every time

Everything is just "Once Upon A Time".

Moving On

Recently it seems she doesn't care at all

I realized I need to stand again after I fall

I don't need to wake up the princess sleeping

For I am not the prince she's dreaming.

Loving is not owning, I should let go

I can't be stuck and be like emo

But the more I wanted to move on

The more I think of you all day long.

Sometimes I wonder if meeting you is good or bad

Because you made me happy though sometimes sad

I'm just sad because it can never be us

But I'm still glad I've been happy in the past.

Is it already the ending?

Or I am just concluding and pretending

It's not that I am being pessimistic

I am just being realistic.

Never Did I

Never did I make use of a lie

Never did I thought of making you cry

Never did I do something to say sorry

Never did I think not to worry

Never did I let myself happy when you're sad

Never did I choose the things that'll make you mad

Never did I care less when you are sick

Never did I call you a freak

Never did I feel I am nothing to you

Never did I blame you when I feel blue

Never did I become greedy as I give you everything

Never did I expect to receive something

Never did I think to hide but offer you love

Never did I hear "I love you Zhab"

Never did I look at physical attraction

Never did I disregard personal affection

I did all the best a man can do

But never did I feel you love me too

And never will I regret that I loved you.

Dreams Are Better Than Reality

There is this guy named Zhab who is truly in love with a girl named Maria. How he wish that it'll be them someday but something's bothering him if that would still happen. He has been thinking of it often, time after time, even until before he sleeps. One night, he over think about it until he slept.

Zhab woke up on his dream, he is now living in his imaginations. There, he woke up early in the morning like it is the reality, everything's the same so Zhab doesn't knew it's only a dream.

There he sees Maria, Zhab often visits her for he wanna see if she is fine. Maria, on the other hand, entertains Zhab whenever they meet. For each day, Zhab feels his love to her is endless, like it will never fade.

One day, Maria knew that she has a heart problem, literally she has a heart disorder as told by her family when she had a check-up. Then, Maria became aware of her actions for her life is in danger since a heart disorder is a big deal.

A day after, she told her classmates about it. Since her classmates are quite close to Zhab, they told him. Zhab was like shocked of the news and so she suddenly visited Maria.

Before Zhab enters their school, he saw Maria with another guy, so he just stayed out of the school and went home after. Zhab, while walking, is thinking that if that guy deserves to take care of Maria's heart, then so be it. h e just wishes Maria would be fine.

Although, deep inside, Zhab knows he can give the best cure and care to Maria's heart but he wasn't given the chance. Just like before, magpaparaya na lang siya.

Zhab, as a gentleman, just stayed away from them to avoid controversies but still he really is concern about her. Zhab just texts Maria to ask if she is fine and glad to say she is.

Month ago, Maria felt so empty. The guy left Maria. Maria was heartbroken, she feels her heart disorder is attacking her. And so she told her mom and ask for a checkup again.

Maria was diagnosed, her heart problem became serious. She is in need of a new heart to survive though her heart is still functioning. Maria stayed at the hospital as her family looks for a donor.

Her mom went to Republic Central Colleges, school of Maria, to help them find a donor. Maria's mom also told Maria's classmates about the condition of Maria and also told them that she was in the hospital.

Everyone we're shocked, they didn't expect that would happen that soon.

Maria's friends immediately texted Zhab about it, as everyone did, he was also shocked. He asked them to wait for him before they go to the hospital. And so they went..

Zhab was thinking where he could ask for help to seek a donor of a heart. There he felt his tender love for her, he thought of himself as a donor. He was thinking of it as they are on their way to the hospital.

Zhab talked with the doctor.

Zhab: Doc, is her heart still functions?

Doc: Yes, but it's weak for her. Depression makes it weaker.

Zhab: I was planning if we could switch our hearts, would that be possible? (Tears Fall)
Doc: That was harsh, but, we can work for it. That will put your life in danger young guy. A weak heart will be given to you.

Zhab: That's fine, if it's the only way we can both exist. Will it be okay?

Doc: If you already decided for it, nothing i can do. Talk o her mom, and the most important, you need to tell your family first.
Zhab: Okay doc. I will. Thank You.

Zhab then went to talk with Maria's mom and called her Tita. (Maria's friends are wondering why, Zhab seems to be so serious)

Zhab: Hello po Tita. I am Zhab, a friend of Maria. Hm. I am planning if I could be the donor. Would you let me? I talked with the doctor, we will switch our hearts.

Maria's Mom: NO. Does your parents know this?
Zhab: Not yet Tita, but after i get your permission, you could help me go to my parents and ask their permission.
Maria's Mom : I would be glad to, but your life would be at risk, your family might not agree.
Zhab: Tita, let's give it a try, please! (Tears Fall) I love your daughter, I am willing to take the risk just for her. You can ask her friends there about how sincere I am for your daughter.
Maria's Mom : Oh. How lucky my daughter is to have you, but why did you let her fall with the wrong man.
Zhab: Tita, it is a long story to tell, Maria's life would be in danger before i get finish. When I knew Maria has a heart problem, i suddenly went to RCC for her, but there, i saw her with another guy. I thought then that he is the one deserving to take care of Maria. I just went off and stay out of them. That's one mistake i committed and now i'll correct my mistake.
Maria's Mom : You are not intended to do it.
Zhab: I know Tita, but I want to. I need to. I love to.
Maria's Mom : (gives a hug) Thank You, (Tears Fall)

Zhab: Tita, one condition, don't tell her friends about it. :)

They went to Zhab's parents.

Zhab: Hi dad and mom, i am here to ask for permission.
(Tita told them Maria's health condition and the plan)
Dad: That was a risky thing, if i were you son, i'll do the same thing. I am very proud of you. But, i cannot risk your life, think of us. we'll be the one to suffer if we'll lose you.
Mom: Your dad was right.

Zhab: I understand, but i'll still live, we'll just have switch of hearts. Dad, i love her. What for could i live if she isn't there anymore? This would be something i'll eternally regret. i wanna live my life not just for me, i'd rather die with her than to live without her.
Dad: You don't know what you're saying!
Zhab: Dad, I know what i am saying, all i need is for you to understand and your permission. Life is not about all your decisions. this would be the first time i'll make my own risky decision. Can you see me crying and regretting everyday if ever something bad would happen to her?
Mom: No. I love you son. It's a yes for me. I'll just support your decisions.

Zhab: Thanks mom. dad, it's all up to you.
Dad: What more can i do?
Zhab: THANKS! (a smile and tears in his face)

Tita: Thank you! I am very happy that my daughter has your son in her life. I thank God :'')

The Operations Happen . . . . . It was a success!

Zhab & Maria, still unawake, shares one room in the hospital but with different bed. Maria woke up first, in the middle of the night, her mom saw her waking up. Maria was not yet on herself but her mom already told her everything that happened. Tita hugs Maria tightly.

Maria's Mom: Maria, you know that guy on the other bed?
Maria: Yes, she's my friend. Why is he there?
Maria's Mom : He loves you.
Maria: I know, he's the one who gave me the gift in my last birthday. But what is he doing there?

Maria's Mom: He saved you.
Maria: What? Saved me from what? I just fell asleep.
Maria's Mom : No. Your heart problem had its worst and he became a donor of the heart.
Maria: Really? Is he still alive? (Tears Fall)
Maria's Mom : Yes, you only had switch of hearts. I was thinking, you two are destined for one another.

Maria: (Tears Fall) I do think so, babawi ako sa kanya once he wake up. The moment he opens his eyes, the moment i'll give him Yes.

Maria's Mom: I'm glad to. Remember, it's his heart which is in you, definitely you'll love the heart on that guy. I can see the real love within the two of you. They say in stories that when two people love each other, it's like they give each other's heart. With what happened, i can say it will be true.

Maria hugs Tita. After it, Maria went to the bed of Zhab and slept there hugging him so tight.

Zhab woke up, amazed that Maria was beside him hugging him and so she sleep again and hugs back Maria.

Many visitors drop by their room, they see them very romantic. Even better when their friends went to them that morning.. Family & Friends of Zhab & Maria are there, they say that they really are meant to be, how cute their story is.

Zhab heard the noise and he wakes up, but in the true life. He wake up hugging his pillow and he's in his bedroom alone. Zhab thought to himelf, "Sometimes Dreams are better than Reality" :((

-
This was a dream of mine, that's all i remember.
It is more dramatic if you will just see what i've seen in my dreams. I hope someday i could be a scriptwriter so i could put that into movies or video clips. :)

How SAD :((

Jesus and Santa Claus

Who’s more important during Christmas?

Is it Jesus or is it Santa Claus?

Remember we celebrate Jesus’ birthday

Not about Santa Claus giving gifts away.

People always think of gifts to receive

We wonder what gift Santa Claus would give

Isn’t it unfair for it’s Christmas Day?

We should be rejoicing for it’s Jesus’ birthday.

In reality, it is true that we wait for blessing

Waiting someone to give us something

We ask Santa Claus to give the best thing

Haven’t you think that Jesus just gave everything?

It is quite sad but it is true

Make a change and start with you.

In this poem, think and reflect

How would Christmas be perfect?

COPYRIGHT :))
That's an original piece of mine.